Counting Down...

Do you ever feel like your life has become one big countdown?? Here are a few in my life right now.

• 5 days until our 2 year anniversary (this time two years ago I was beside myself with excitement!!!)
• 3 1/2 days of school before the summer!
• 4 1/2 days of work before I become a "stay at home mom"
• 8 days until I get to see my wonderful college roomies again
• 9 days until my baby shower that my sweet friends are throwing for me
• 36(ish) days until we move to Lubbock
• 88(ish) days until we get to meet our precious baby girl!!!

I know that we are to live for today, and cherish this moment, and honestly I do feel like I am doing that. Especially as I feel this little girl kicking and moving inside of me, it's hard not to feel "in the moment," and to cherish every second of it. But, I have always been a "count down" kind of a person, and I feel like there are a lot of exciting and scary things happening in our lives in the very near future...and so I countdown (as I cherish today??). :)

Some things I wish I could countdown to:

• when our house will sell
• when we will have a name picked out for our little girl
• when we will find, buy, and move into our very own house in Lubbock

But, "there is a time for everything and a season for every activity under heaven." It's not in our control, and for that I am relieved. Our faith is in someone so much bigger than us who sees our future. Praise the Lord for that! And so until then, I remember that "those who wait on the Lord shall renew their strength, they will soar on wings like eagles, they will run and not grow weary, they will walk and not grow faint." (I can't imagine running at this point in my pregnancy)...and so I can wait on the Lord...He is my strength!

What's in a Name?

A LOT apparently...

We can not decide on a name. Who knew this was going to be outrageously hard for me! I think Brad is way more laid back about it than I have become. Sometimes I have to make myself completely quit thinking about it or it will totally overwhelm me. We had picked out the name Macie, Macie Layne to be exact. The more I thought about it, though the more I wasn't sure. I know this shouldn't be this hard. The problem is not that we can't think of any names, the problem is that there are so many. BUT, another problem comes in with the fact that I am a teacher and have had so many of the "cute" names in my class, without the cute personality, and so then that name reminds me of a certain kid that I don't want to name my child after. I know that sounds bad, but you know how you can associate a name with a person, well I happen to teach five year olds, so they have all of the latest names, so so many of the names we like are in my class/or another kinder class this year. But really, I think I'm afraid of commiting to a name. But, at the same time I can't wait until I can actually refer to her by her name.

I know that that is a lot of rambling, but it's just really hard. There was a lady at my school this past year who had a baby and they didn't tell anyone the name until after they had met their baby and told her her name. I didn't really understand why you would want to do that, until now. I think I would be way less stressed out about it if I could say, "we're not telling her name yet," instead of, "we don't know her name yet!" Because then people would at least think we had a name picked for the poor girl.

Why is this so hard? There is one name that I love, but that name right now means a student I have had in the past. My thoughts though, are that if we name our daughter that then she will be who I associate that name with, not this other little girl...right? Haha. I still think Macie Layne is a very cute name, I just don't know if that is who this little girl is. Maybe Emma, or Aubrey?

Again, I can't wait to meet her...I just hope she has a name before then!! :)

It was JUST a dream!

I thought I would share one of my crazy pregnant dreams with you...

Background: Many people have seen this picture of a pregnant woman, and you can see the impression of a foot pushing out through her belly. Very cool picture. And I think it's where my dream originates.

So, I dreamed the other night that our little girl had her foot pushed into my belly and you could see the impression of her foot. It was so cool! So cool in fact that I didn't want Brad to miss it. Since he was just in the other room, I grabbed the little foot that was pushing out in order to hold it in place until Brad could see. Well, he saw it...and I BROKE her foot! I was mortified. We went to the doctor (obviously), and he told me I was the only mom he knew of that could break their child while they were still in the womb. He was even so worried that he gave me my own ultrasound machine in order to check her and make sure I didn't break her again. AGH!

Can you imagine a more terrible dream? To be told I broke my child, and to actually have done it. I think that it's probably one of those inner thought things that probably means that I'm worrying about whether I'm going to be a good mom, and if I can keep her safe and take care of her, etc., etc. But, I have to believe that that is normal, especially for first time moms. I mean, let's face it, I have no idea what I'm doing! But, somehow, in rare moments like this, I know I can do it, I can't tell you how I'm going to do it, but I know I can - WE can! Brad and I will learn together, and like so many other parents, all of whom have been parents for the first time before, we'll learn. And in the meantime we'll give our little girl all the love we can! We love her so much already. I can't wait to meet her. It's getting closer. :)

And I'm Back...

So, I thought that my blog was going to leave me defeated. For the first time in a long time I felt completely and utterly computer illiterate. I was watching all of my friends (and the parents of the kids in my class, which is a huge blow to the confidence) create these amazing blogs, and I couldn't figure it out. I also didn't feel much motivation as I thought no one even knew about my blog. However, after being told that there's never anything on my blog to read, I realized...I needed to figure this thing out. WELL, let me just say I have a great sense of accomplishment as I sit here with a blog I feel somewhat ok with. It is not perfect yet, and I'm still working out some details...but it's WAY better than it was before. AND, come to find out...it wasn't my problem at all, nope, it was my computer (isn't it always REALLY the computers fault anyways?). Apparently, some of the settings on it are incompatable with blogging. So, after switching computers, downloading a new version of windows, restarting my computer, trouble shooting, set up wizards, and error messages, I finally figured it out! WOOHOO! It's a good thing Brad is working tonight or he would think I was crazy for spending so long working on something like setting up a blog. However, I have been doing laundry as I work. :)

In baby news...nothing really new. We had a good doctor's visit two weeks ago, great heartbeat. She is a little squirmy wormy, though. She moves all the time. Not that I am complaining, but it's just fun, and sometimes kind of funny. I wish I could see what she was doing in there. It feels like she's flipping and somersaulting all over the place. She has definitely moved up higher (as my uterus is now the size of a SOCCER BALL!), and I feel her kicking more behind and right below my belly button. Speaking of growing, we have entered our third trimester. AMAZING! It has really flown by. I know that the next couple of weeks will fly by as I finish out the school year and pack up my classroom, and then it's on to relaxing, preparing, and waiting for Baby Girl's arrival in August. I know it will be hot, but I don't have anything to do or anywhere to be...so really what better time to be pregnant!

In us news...pray for Brad and I as we pray and seek out God's will for our lives. Brad has applied for a job in Lubbock, and as you can imagine this is a HUGE decision for us. If he gets the job and we accept, we would be in Lubbock by July. I can't even imagine how all of this could come together! We appreciate your prayers, more than you know!

Off to fold the laundry and then to bed. Yeah for being "back" in the blogging world! :)